Spin-off Reader Matches

Last fall I posted my profile on the Chicago Reader Matches Internet Dating site. I got a few interesting responses, mostly from Japanese business men. Anyway, I was thinking I should update my profile. A man recently wrote me and said that I should reconsider my dealbreaker of not dating men who golf. I suppose that is fair and really judgemental of me. So okay, I think golf is lame and boring but hey maybe I am not being open. The Reader only allows five words to create a dreamy headline that is suppose to grab the attention of my potential soulmate. Five Words!!! And only 100 for a profile. So I'm doing an alternative profile right here in my blog where absolutely no man will see it.

I'm Not the Type of Girlfriend That Needs to be Watered Every Day

(My other headline idea was: I'm a Carrie with a Charlotte Rising)

What I mean by that is I can go to a movie sans a man. I like and need a lot of alone time. I contradict myself a lot. I like Coltrane and . . . Tenacious D. I like camping and the opera. I'm both spiritual and sarcastic. I'll laugh at a SNL rerun with Stewart Smally yet I practice yoga. I cry at every Charlie Brown Holiday special.

Like the Diane Keaton character from Something Has Got To Give, I don't date well and I don't date often. I'm a very faithful girlfriend but I hate the phrase "settle down". I want to "settle up"! Settling down implies the attitude that you might as well put a fork in you because you are done. I want a man who inspires me that I can grow with and by grow I don't mean—wide. I'm committed to a healthy lifestyle. My morning protein shake is like a NASA science project.

I want what every woman wants—someone funny, smart, sensitive and attractive—ya know somebody I would actually want to make out with. I do believe that there are many nice guys out there but I'm just not attracted to them. Besides the golf thing, I'm not into guys who are Super Fans. No Chicago Da Bears action here. I'm the last girl that would ever be seen at a sports bar on Kareoke night singing something from the Bare Naked Ladies catelogue, which makes me something of a novelty here in good ole Chicago. I also have some more serious dealbreakers like racism, verbal abuse and I prefer to date men that do not have children.

Oh and I'm a Scorpio which means I'm deadly sexy.